Suozzi Should Consider Running for President--- of Titan.

[Kurt Vonnegut]

Pardon the pun, but this is clearly a match made in heaven.

Think about it. Suozzi is going nowhere on Earth. Spitzer stands in his way with regards to the gubernatorial nod in 2006. Kennedy and Cuomo are ahead of him on line for the nod for Attorney General. Hevesi blocks any Suozzi bid for Comptroller. And LT Gov is largely a ceremonial job, and is probably going to an African American or Hispanic because there are far too many white males already on the Democratic Statewide ticket.

While the combustible Herr Suozzi may be unsuitable for a Statewide Run in New York, he is a perfect match for Titan, one of Saturn's Moons which was immortalized in my novel, The Sirens of Titan. The europoean space agency has confirmed that Titan s a combustible world, filled with rivers of liquid methane. Such a world is looking for a combustible leader.

Ok, so the surface temperature may be -270 degrees. And maybe hostile to a life form which is comprised primarily of water... An ordinary human would not last a second on Titan.

But clearly, Ton Suozzi is not the ordinary human. After all, much like Titan, which experiences green house conditions due to the heavy methane atmosphere, Tom Suozzi is mostly hot air anyway.

So, it is quite possible that Mr. Suozzi would thrive on Saturn's moon. And in time come to rule with an iron fist.

[Puddin' Pantz]

Don't forget the Puddin'

Ole Puddin Pantz Suozzi has got hot fudge in his pants as well as hot air!

[kurt Vonnegut]

So Mr. Pants, is it your position that Mr. Suozzi emits methane gas from both his front and rear orifice?

[Space Seed]

I got an idea -- they can freeze Tom Suozzi and his senior staff in suspended animation and shoot them into outerspace, much like they did to Khan on Star Trek. They can even call the ship the USS Sylver.

[Careful Pudding Pantz]

Suozzi may be going somewhere after all. Doesn't it seem odd to you that he and Levy had a meeting with both Bruno and Silver together, while there's talk that Pataki may throw in the rag and D'Amato crosses over to endorse Spitzer, Delaraba appears at a Suozzi fundraiser? It seems to me like there's an awful lot of deals being cut - and it wouldn't be surprising if one of them cuts Suozzi in. Don't know for what yet - and I'm just hoping whatever it is - it doesn't include the CE election this year.

[dear careful]

you watch too many Michael Moore movies. Besides, it's Hillary Clinton's rear end that Suozzi must kiss now.... as well as Spitzer's .... Tom needs to be content with his role in Nassau County... Or take that flight to Titan.